By Owen Charters, President & CEO, BGC Canada

November 18, 2024

We don’t have to want to get down on the floor and play mini-stick hockey to love kids – and you don’t need to provide shoulder rides for photos. You just have to believe in their possibilities and want to give them their opportunities.

For some reason, the debate about kids – whether we like them, want them, and what we’re supposed to ‘feel’ if we’re a parent are all over the media right now.

Debates about parenting – do you have to like being a parent to be a parent? Do you even need to like kids to be a parent?

My friend from university, who swore she didn’t like kids – ended up as a teacher, and then had three kids of her own that she adores. And my childless friends who love kids, work with kids, and are basically surrogate parents to many kids.

Yet within our Club world, there are so many versions of why we want to work with kids, or at least, for kids.

I have always loved working with kids – trying to figure them out, what makes each one tick, and cherishing the good and the bad ones. (Badly behaved, that is – I really don’t believe there are bad kids.)

Related: BGC Clubs are a modern solution to help parents

A few Club staff have been surprised when I got down on the ground to interact with Club kids, had them climb on me for a photo, engage in a conversation or exchange silly jokes.

Whatever our motivations are for working for kids, it is the spark of joy in their eyes that I believe we each live for, the opening up of ideas, options, and possibilities for them. That’s not just our responsibility as parents, but as Clubs.

BGC Clubs provide opportunities that set young people up for success

• 95% of Club kids have more people they like to spend time with. 
• 92% of Club kids are better at helping out when it is needed. 
• 91% of Club kids are more excited to try new things. 
• 91% of Club kids are more confident in their abilities. 
• 90% of Club kids feel more comfortable being themselves. 
• 90% of Club kids are more aware of the feelings of others. 
• 90% of Club kids are more physically active. 
• 90% of Club kids work better with others. 

We don’t have to want to get down on the floor and play mini-stick hockey to love kids – and you don’t need to provide shoulder rides for photos. You just have to believe in their possibilities and want to give them opportunities. 

By Owen Charters, President & CEO, BGC Canada

October 25, 2024

Raising kids is difficult and it takes a village—that’s just the way modern society is built. But we live in an era where the village doesn’t live with us, and we need modern solutions to help parents. BGC Clubs are that modern solution.

Parenting is hard

Recently, parents have been told that their job is so stressful that the US surgeon-general issued a health advisory for the impact of parenting on mental health. They’re given advice on how to discipline and guide their kids in the best possible way—but the advice is never-ending and always changing.

The media has focused recently on ‘gentle parenting’, including the backlash on how hard it is on parents – and for bystanders to observe. It’s not easy to watch a toddler have a screaming tantrum in a restaurant and hear parents say things like, “I know that the whip cream falling off your cake makes you sad and angry. It’s okay to be sad and angry. Let it out and then we can talk about it.”

The new approach is lighthouse parenting – being a stable, firm guide, and recognizing that parents can’t always acknowledge every emotion before their kid gets their snowsuit and boots on and out the door before being late for school and work.  It’s an improvement, but still just one more evolution of how-to parent.

One of the more extreme examples of gentle parenting that I saw recently was someone writing a parenting column with a problem of their lessons coming back to bite them. They had taught their kid that they should follow the “My Body, My Choice” principle, which helps keep kids safe and autonomous.  However, their kid now had decided they would not take baths, nor wear the appropriate clothes for the weather. “My body, my choice! – they insisted on any parental request. The columnist was quick to point out that a parent has responsibilities they need to enforce, including that every principle has limits and variables and even exceptions. And sometimes a kid just has to do something because a parent says so. Time for more lighthouse parenting.

Raising kids is difficult and it takes a village—but we live in an era where the village doesn’t live with us. Grandparents, aunts, uncles and family that could often chip in frequently live far away. So, we require institutional help. That’s just the way modern society is built.

BGC Clubs are the modern solution to help parents

Even though Clubs have been around for 125 years, we are that modern solution. We help parents by taking the load off, giving them security that their child is in a safe, supportive place. No grandma or uncle is needed.

We go further—we have created three programs focused on parenting: Parenting Without Power Struggles, Parents in the Know, and Parents Together! Thirteen Clubs across the country have received grants to continue or implement parenting programs. Our role in supporting parents only continues to grow.

Related: BGC Clubs are a safe ‘third place’

At the outset, there was some debate about whether we should be in the parenting business. Our focus is serving children and youth – not adults. But it was clear that parents needed help, and they were coming to us as experts in childhood and teen development. Ultimately, we know that better parents create stronger, more resilient children and youth, so this work is right in our wheelhouse.

Helping parents is central to who Clubs are and what we do

Fewer people are having kids citing the cost of raising kids and the challenges of being a parent. The choice to become a parent is a deeply personal one, but it should not be constrained because we can’t help parents do a good job. Ultimately, the more resources we can provide parents, the easier that choice becomes. And most importantly, the easier we can make it for parents today. That’s our job, and we are rising to the challenge.

Read more:

• BGC Clubs need to grow to create opportunities for Canadian kids
• BGC Clubs provide kids with basic needs so they can have brighter futures
• BGC Clubs provide opportunities to young people